There is Truth in the Lies
Today started off badly. I’ve been dealing with the concept of no AC as our AC guy has failed to find the leak on the least three visits, but he pumped it up more full of Freon than ripple in a wino’s system so it lasted Friday and Saturday and wheezed to a dead stop around noon yesterday and then it got stuffy. And when I say stuffy, let’s say I’d rather be sitting in a sauna with a bunch of wise guys I owed money as a respite from the warmth. The front of the house was cooler, so I half-dazedly lurched up there with a blanket into the cold and slept on the most uncomfortable couch ever. My sweat crystallized to frozen droplets as I fell asleep. I woke up in the most awkward position ever, as though I slept with my entire weight on my head and I had a crick in it, so I was not feeling like a shiny, happy person. That it was a new day and that I was tired and that it was Monday did nothing to add to the thrill of the day.
I had one of those existential moments as I sat down and the computer booted up. The whole “why am I doing what I’m doing” sort of thing. And then I checked my email. This is kinda funny, since I wrote the story Pretty Good Protection recently and talked about spam mail. I got a spam piece of email today and I opened it. Sometimes I read them, sometimes I don’t, but I always scan them, well my autobots scan them, so that’s good enough for me. The spam was playing off the whole Japanese earthquake thing and it was a horrible thing to pull at people’s heartstrings, but they got points for originality coupled with depravity. I mentioned this on Twitter and someone asked me to forward it to them. The person in question happens to be the person writing the intro for Agents of Oblivion and he asked if he had sent it, as he’s in the middle of a hectic schedule. He hadn’t. He sent it–it had been done for a few weeks. It was just what I needed to perk me up.
This intro was brilliant and insightful and said nice things about me and my work. Really nice things. I felt validated and vindicated and that this email had somehow been delayed to await me at a moment where I felt my day might better be served shooting pool and drinking some cheap beer and listening to old tunes as opposed to writing. This happens to all of us. I know the pulled muscle in my neck and my lack of sleep and my crushing disappointment in not getting to attend GenCon all conspired to put me in one bad, reflective mood. It was like I had some sort of hangover without the joy of drinking the night before and those words were the BC Powder I needed to get going again.
I don’t care if somebody does something for two hours, two years, or twenty years, if they don’t ever have a moment where they’d rather be doing something else, they are liars. As all liars are writers, it kinda reinforces the point. The takeaway for today is if you are having a bad day, process why you’re having a bad day and, if needs dictate and time allows, throw yourself a little pity party, otherwise buck up, dig deep, and keep writing. There is truth in the lies.
Until next time, I bid you, dear reader, adieu!
If it helps: about 75% of my RPG purchases over the last several months have been Reality Blurs products. :)